His Dark Materials

I fear that this post will say far more about me than it does about the books themselves and I know that I will get into a rather large heap of trouble from a certain friend if she ever reads this post. She'll know who she is, so if you are reading this, stop now! I'd also advise you to stop if you liked this trilogy.
It was over ten years ago when I first became aware of His Dark Materials. It was during the BBC's Big Read of the nation's 100 favourite books. It finished third which is a very impressive feat, only beaten by two books I feel very differently about; Lord of the Rings, which I can't begin to tell you how much I loathe, and Pride and Prejudice, which might, in my opinion, be just about the perfect book. I did little with this information except file it away until I was in a position to read it, shortly after all the hoo-har had died down. So shortly after I commenced my bookselling career, 10 years and counting, it was one of the first books I borrowed off the shelf and started to read.
It started off very well. I was entranced by the thought of Lyra hiding in the cupboard with her daemon as it shifted it's form next to her. I was on edge wondering if she would be caught. Then as the slide show began the magic word was uttered. Dust. At this point I lost all interest in everything that had gone before and put the book down in disgust.
About a year later I felt a little ashamed of myself so I tried it again with exactly the same result. I should point out that I do have form with this. I tried to read The Hobbit when I was ten or thereabouts and I never made it past the first sentence, there were just too many problems in those nine words for me. I still haven't got past the first sentence of The Hobbit to this day.
Anyway to cut a long story short I decided to read Northern Lights again before the film of the Golden Compass came out (I haven't seen the film and really don't want to). I finished it this time and got much further. It's over six years ago and since I have no intention of reading them again, some of my memories may be a little hazy, but instead of a review, here are a few of the thoughts I have marshalled together.
Lyra is one of the most annoying children in literature. She's a spoilt little brat who I couldn't stand and even though she is the main protagonist of the Northern Lights I couldn't wait for the story to move on so she wasn't in it. Mrs Coulter was about as threatening as a blancmange. Her daemon was slightly more so, but only slightly. I did however like the Polar Bears, and normally I dislike Polar Bears. The initial meeting was quite good and the battle was very scary and intense, That was the highpoint of the book. Everything else was just a little Meh. I just didn't get the supposed big themes. They were obviously just too subtle for me, or I was disliking the book so much that I was just in a rush to get to the end and couldn't be bothered to look deeper at the book and what it was trying to say.
I then did try to read the Subtle Knife. I can remember even less about this book than I can the first. I do sort of remember Will, a new character in this volume, used his knife to open a door to a new world where I think there were no children. That sounded rather blissful.
That's it for the second instalment. It seriously made that much impact on me. I did finish it though, even though I was getting steadily more vexed with it, but I made it and did get the the Amber Spyglass.
I was determined to read the whole lot. However, I was reading The Amber Spyglass in the bath,a pleasant image there for you, and this woman, who I can't remember who she was or where she came from, somehow travelled to a world where she met some creatures had a wheel for legs. This was the point that I threw the book across the room, where it hit the radiator and lay there for at least the next month. I was just too angry to even touch it.
So I never finished His Dark Materials. I don't feel ashamed to say that though I probably should. It's just not a series that is for me. It made me so angry when I read it that I couldn't look at the books without wanting to hide them away so I, or anyone else couldn't see them. I'm cross with myself as much as anything, but I maintain that the books are not as good as everyone says that they are.
It's been a long time since I read them and my hatred for them has slightly subsided over that time to a point where I am more indifferent about them. If you've enjoyed them I'm very happy for you. Alas, my abiding memory of His Dark Materials is one of frustration and anger.
Oddly I do still have my copies somewhere. I just don't know why.